McCain shocks America with running mate choice

DAYTON, OHIO — In a move that stunned political experts, Republican presidential candidate John McCain announced FridayPolley
morning that he had chosen Sarah Polley as his running mate. The announcement sent shock waves through America, as politicians and others turned to their colleagues and said, "Who the $%#@ is that?"

Many were soon googling the name "Sarah Polley" and reading her Wikipedia page. They were surprised to learn that Polley is an actress and director with hardly any political experience. Even more stunning was the fact that Polley is a Canadian. Millions of people turned to Google again, asking, "Can a Canadian become vice president of America?"

As political experts debated on CNN whether McCain was trying to strengthen ties with America's northern neighbor, McCain issued a retraction, saying he had meant to say "Sarah Palin," not "Sarah Polley." Palin is the Republican governor of Alaska.

"It was an easy mistake to make," McCain said. "Their names sound alike and they've both got experience freezing their butts up north."

The choice of Palin sent more shock waves through America, as politicians and
others turned to their colleagues and said, "Who the $%#@ is that?"

McCain had been considering such political veterans as Minnesota Gov. Tim Pawlenty, former Pennsylvania Gov. Tom Ridge and former Massachusetts Gov. Mitt Romney, but said he wanted to pick someone who would give him an edge over Barack Obama, someone who was "younger and cuter."

Picking a female running mate may help McCain lure Hillary Clinton's supporters, many of whom have been slow to commit to Obama. "Of course, I want support from female voters," McCain said. "But that's not why I chose Sarah Polley. I mean, Pollen. No, hang on a minute … let me double-check the name and get back to you."

Meanwhile, Polley said she had been "thrilled to bits" when she heard from news reporters that McCain had picked her, only to be let down a couple of hours later.

"It's disheartening," she said. "But it isn't the first time I've lost a role that I thought I had."

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  1. Good thing he didn’t say Sara Dallin, Gordon Brown would’ve been ecstatic!, Hehe. Nice one Sir.

  2. Very nice one…he doesnt even know the name of his running mate. Will he remember when…no let me take that back instantly ..IF they are sworn in? It would be a terrible thing to happen.
    “And now let me tell you, fellow Americans, that the vice president, Sarah Polley” then an aid whispers in his ear, and he grunts and says into the mic, “I meant Sarah Darlin” , and the aid bends again to his ear and he waves the guy back while Sarah Palin says into the mic in front of her.
    “Just Sarah would do, thanks John”

  3. Sedate Me says:

    Making things funnier is that Sarah Polley is not your average actress with a Sarah P- name. She has quite an interest in politics and probably has much better knowledge of political issues than Palin does.
    She was once involved in a political demonstration that turned into a serious riot. The cops beat the crap out of the 5’2″ actress and nearly all present. If memory serves me, they cracked her ribs and knocked out a couple of teeth.
    Because she’s a lefty and has disdain for the shallowness of Hollywood celebrity, being confused with a talentless bimbo chosen to run for VP just because of her looks would probably DEEPLY offend Polley.
    For the record, I’d rather “poll” Polley than Palin, if you know what I mean.

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